Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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Maths.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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