Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

What's worse than swing a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...