Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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what is like a duck and quacks ? A duck.

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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A man is jogging down the street. He bangs his kneecap into a metal pole and shatters it. He is then hit by a giant cheese wheel and dies.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

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Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

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Why was the homeless man lying on the floor? Because he was dead

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Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops