A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

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What Happens when you shoot a deer? It's Dead

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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who is 2 chainz? no one 2 chains is just 2 chains. spelled with an "s" not a "z"

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What red and goes up and down? A tomato in an elevator.

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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My love life

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

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angelosnyder is not gay

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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bryden is a faggot

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roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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