roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

Why did the blonde walk into a glass wall? Because she either wasn't watching where she was going or the wall was so clean that it appeard not to be there

What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

Q: Why are Dino-Nuggets so good? A: Because they are nuggets in the shape of dinosaurs.

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Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

Face Hunter is scum

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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