Horse.

alert("Hello");

A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Assuming the fact that these children are in fact deceased, it would be highly inprobable that they could perform any task. Or that they would need to see any light at all, since the point of that dark room is to keep them concealed.

Can a man reproduce with only one testicle? No because girls don't dig that sh*t

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

"Have you seen the food African kids eat?" "No.." "NEITHER HAVE THEY!!"

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

Johny got a iphone ipad and a macbook. He bragged to his friend. His friend said, i got an apple.

a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

Why did a black person beat a white person in a race? The white person was hindered because a polar bear was biting their leg the entire time.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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