- Anti Joke

Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? runs

Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

Oh, right

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

a black man did not eat chicken.

Link ate ink to make him sink.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? runs

Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

Oh, right

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

a black man did not eat chicken.

Link ate ink to make him sink.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is quite strange, but then realizes he is dreaming. He awakes and tells his wife about it. His wife tells him to go to sleep. The bartender is now sad because he realizes his marriage is in shambles

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? runs