Why did the girl need a peice of gum after spending 20 minutes parked in the truck with her boyfriend? Because she had spent the last 20 minutes eating sweets, which she couldnt let her mom know she had eaten because her mom calls her fat everyday even though she only weighs 110 pounds, and forces her to only eat vegetables.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

What did the man say when he was stabbed on the street? Nothing, because he died.

What happened after the lawer jumped off the bridge? His family mourned his loss for years.

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

Helen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it "NUuhHUhhuUUUuhhhuuuuumph!"

Why was Yabba annoyed? Because the idiots who do the audio description voiceover for Timmy Time on BBC iPlayer frequently refer to her as a male even though she is clearly a female duck.

roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

I just threw up..In my pants.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

antonis sister is mighty fine

What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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