What is the difference between 10 dead babies and a 1,000,000 dollar car I don't have a 1,000,00 dollar car

Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

It was a beautiful day, John was driving in his car down the street, Kameron was riding his bike preparing for a bike race the following day, and Griffin was having his 7th birthday party. John ran over Kameron and Griffin, he killed Griffin and broke Kameron's legs to where he could never stand/ride again

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

Why did the man sit down? Because he was tired of standing up.

Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

Knock Knock! Who's there?! Michelle Bachman.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 was having illicit sexual relationships with 9, of which 6 knew about, but was afraid to inform his wife, 8, who 7 stepped over to get to 9.

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to go to heaven because his girlfriend Margaret was cooked into chicken sandwhiches, and he had no kids and he didn't want to marry someone else, so he tried to get ran over but no cars hit him so he cooked himself. AND so he became KFC-Style chicken wings. BUUUT since no one ate them, he grabbed them up from heaven and commented on how delicious he was and proceeded to eat more and then exploded, sending him to heaven's heaven. But it was just a dream. And Margaret had to do laundry some more today because he freaking caused a urine tsunami. You're welcome.

where do you hide a black mans paycheck? somewhere he would never find it

a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

What do you call a black person born in America? American.

What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

Whats worse than not having fun at a party? Getting so drunk at a party that you shat in your pants Whats worse than shatting in your pants at a party drunk? Shatting in you pants twice because you were so drunk again.

roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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