How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

What do you call a ginger in an oven? A ginger in an oven

Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

what are you your not a human? are you an other?

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A victim of animal cruelty.

can you touch your toes? no

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

why did the mushroom go to the party? because he`s a fungi

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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