Why couldn't the man lick his elbows? Because it is scientifically proven that over 98% of humans can not lick their elbows.

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the government, your home is being repossessed.

Your mama's so fat, that she died of diabetes

Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Q. Why did the man die? A. Natural Causes

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...