How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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Hello

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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Ask me if I like pie. Do you like pie? OF COURSE!!!!!

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What did god say when he made the first african american? "I got about 3 more humans to go and about 400,000,000 more insects and plants"..

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

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Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

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Caller:Hello, is this Smellma Pitts Answer: Why yes

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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What do black people and apples have in common? - They both look good hanging from trees.

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

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What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

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Why is this joke funny It isn't

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

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Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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What do you call black people in a pool? African american swimmers

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Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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