i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

Whats the difference of a pile of dead babys and a lambrogini? One of them is not inside of my garage.

Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

lucas sehnoun told me anti-joke was funny

What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

These jokes don't have punchlines.

American: Nice cowboy hat Australian: hahahahahaha American: What's so funny? Australian: You're so incompetent... American: What does incompetent mean? Australian: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/78/Trollface.svg/200px-Trollface.svg.png

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

What did the trucker say when his hat blew out the window? "**** my hat!" What did the teenager say when the same thing happened to him in his small car? The same thing, except he was a teenager, driving a small car.

What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

why did the US nuke japan besause sending chuck norris would be to cruel

A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

Ebola

all the kids had fun

Roses are Red Violets are Blue This poem makes no sense Trampoline

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

What do you get when you cross a Pigeon with a Mailbox? A Carrier Pigeon, they are extinct now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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