ure mama's so fat

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

I'm HIV positive.

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

Q: What's Funnier than a baby spinning around a pole at 300 MPH? A: Stopping it with a shovel.

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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