What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Your mamas so fat, she was self-conscious about her weight and became an antisocial vegetable.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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pudding

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

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I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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who are the worlds fastest readers? the people who jumped on 911 cause they read 48 stories in 10 seconds

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

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why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

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life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

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Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops