What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

What is white and long? A New York winter

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

What's worse than cancer? Nothing.

What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

Knock knock.

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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