how many jews can you fit into a car 5, two in the front three in the back

What do you get if you cross an Irishman with a Brazilian Aristocrat? I don't know.

Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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