How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

what did the boy say to his mum when he got home from school nothing he has no tongue

I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

Get on the boat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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