What's better then one dead baby in a tub? Many things a dead baby is a tragedy.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

What do you call an office worker with no arms or legs? A paraplegic.

I walk into a bar...

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

Do you want icecream, Björn?

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

What's worse that pooping in your pants having someone see it

http://api.solvemedia.com/papi/media?c=2@4kVxPaRsBr6xmKYFf1AWrnUekZ5Qm16e@VS0Tc9Os5q8ENU8bgrSzdX9APTC4lJjowvMEvv53MnevBtoOvXkqvmo6q3GRjryi4pBIcsYECoiZmERhCMm3t7otsPlwyu31uNcluNyw3UKXeBeML2ZQF3X3Wfs3WC6Cdp-lOv-Y0fRdSiML4k2yPqmVJrbT.a9hCr0BoWsRJvq7n7aejLjOmz3h3eZDdwJaN54pFV-QOvO5sQ5wVZlVq-2yi9hMbBbb213AoVTT7vLIhTq0xcBFvtuMdWdS2jn2ActORr3W16MmSEVcgrS6gA;w=300;h=150;fg=ffffff;bg=5d216b

Can I have a dollar? I don't know, can you?

How do you hit a clown off a swing? There are many was of acting upon this situation but the most successful approach would be hitting the clown with a heavy object,

A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

Just found out that it doesn't work.

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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