A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

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Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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What did Hitler say to Mussolini? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Matthew Baker

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What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

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How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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