whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

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how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

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What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

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Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

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why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops