- Anti Joke

A man walks into a bar and see's a 12 inch pianoist. He walks to the bar tendar and asks "Where'd you get it" The bar tendar says we have a genie in the back. So the man walks back the and wishes for 12 million BUCKS , The genie gives him 12 million DUCKS, The man walks back out and said " I asked for 12 million BUCKS not 12 million DUCKS and the bar tendar says do you really think i asked for a 12 inch pianoist?

Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

Japanese study of the stereotypical American man: Murica: Come on come on! Japanese: Uh yes? walks toward American Murica: Are you okay?! Japanese: Well yes I am doi.. Murica: BUSTER WOLF Punches Japanese which smacks into the ground critically wounded. Murican: OKAAAAAAAAAAAY! throws dirty trucker cap at Japanese man and leaves.* BEWARE OF THE TYPICAL AMERICAN! Study 2 American man, taught Japanese Discipline: Japanese: Herrow Mr.Educated American bows "Japanesed Murican": Fighting Pose " I SHALL STAIN MY HANDS, WITH YOUR BLOOD!" Japanese people run away Experiment fail. BEWARE EXTREMELY OF AMERICAN MAN! Nero: Nuking Japan probably created a few controversies and wrong stereotypes... After visiting the US several times, I find these manners to be of the Texan stereotype though... Educated Murican: PREDICTABO!

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Cinema greatest shit final, anime and videogames dont translate well into movies edition: One day... a young man named Tyler Reed, is chased by the notorious bully named Peter Ganondorf... Just then... he coincidentally utters "I AM THE LINK!" And a great lightning bolt strikes him... Tyler Becomes THE LINK! As for Peter Ganondorf... he became a pile of burning ashes... But Just then THE LINK, gets contacted by Jessica Fairy! And receives a important message... The evil Dr.Bullshitious has destroyed the connection without earth and planet Zelda! And that is bad... BECAUSE! Can Tyler Reed use his powers of lightning fast flight, and collect the TWO pieces of the mystic "triforce" to earn the ultimate weapon? The Master gun! Most importantly, can he become THE LINK between Planet Zelda and Earth? Shows random shots that you cant make shit of like those movies you know suck just from the narration ZELDA: THE LINK TO PLANET EVOLUTION! Moral: Still better than Dragon Ball Evolution...

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman? A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head! A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear. Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?" "The sucker called again!"

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

A Jew, a black guy, and a redneck are walking down the street because their car broke down a few miles back.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, whereas Michael Jackson was a singer.

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

I couldn't decide whether to buy a pepperoni or a meat feast pizza? So i got neither and my two year old son died of starvation.

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

rent a cops

Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

What did the water bottle say to the Itunes gift card Nothing,they're both innament object and don't have mouths.

What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops