- Anti Joke

What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: silence Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

ask me if i am a tree. no.

Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

what is more fun than shower time with adele. a mass gang bang with antonia

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why'd he fall off again? Because we put him back on.

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

NEVER

There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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