What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? wheres my farmer?

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

Women's Rights

what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

View Terms of Service

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

an american walks out of a strip club.

A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

Gun laws don't work because criminals don't pay attention to the laws

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

if life gives you melons, then you're most likely dyslexic.

What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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