A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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A little boy who was sleeping in his parent's bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't. He said nothing, and the incident troubled him deeply for many years.

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

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why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

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What's bigger than China and Smaller than my penis? Russia and a smaller penis.

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A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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why is cancer a big thing because its bad

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

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Chuck noris is so awesome that he brings a knife to a gun-fight, and wins

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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