What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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being sober in a bar fight

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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A black guy, a Jew, and a Mexican jump out of a plane. Who dies first? Well, judging by the fact that black people in general have a higher body mass, the black man most likely would smash into the ground first.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice? She was reading the nutrition facts, as she was trying to watch her weight.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops