What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

thumb_up thumb_down

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down

What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

thumb_up thumb_down

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

thumb_up thumb_down

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

thumb_up thumb_down

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Tell her to inform the police that her significant other is assaulting them and that she should file a restraining order.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

thumb_up thumb_down

chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

thumb_up thumb_down

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

thumb_up thumb_down

What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

thumb_up thumb_down

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down

Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the blonde in the library? Because she was committed to her studies and was getting ready for a test.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops