Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I am dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did hitler give his granddaughter? A gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the hooker get for Christmas ? AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops