knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

I had friends on the Death Star.

if you don't like this you're gay

A women in the kitchen.

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

Good afternoon.

say it ten times fast: oh

What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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