a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

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a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

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why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

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Obama

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If you put two black men in an empty room, what will they do? They will most likely try to figure out why they have been put in such a confusing scenario. Then one of the black men will suggest the possibility that maybe they are being used as a subject of a joke. The other black man agrees then they both hang themselves since they have no other purpose in life.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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A man drove up to a drive-thru. He ordered a coke, but the lady at the window spilled it on his lap. He promptly changed his clothes and accepted the lady's apology.

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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I have a really funny joke.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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