Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

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What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? wheres my farmer?

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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