A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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what do round tank toilets do? blow up CC

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Neil is a reterd.

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Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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why did justin go to maddie parris house to fuck her.....

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza

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What is sticky and smelly - a stick

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

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Why did the kid take the trash out to the movies? Because his mum said take out the trash

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops