A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? It entered a KFC and had the unfortunate suprise of having its head cut off.

wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

A chicken decides to cross a road. Unfortunately it gets ran over and does. The end.

What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Why did the fireman die? For various reasons,one was because he was burnt alive.

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

what did the african boy get for christmas? what does his ethnicity or his place of origin have anything to do with what he gets for christmas

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

Who's worse: Ghandi or Hitler Answer: Hitler

Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

Q. What do cows and grass have in common? A. They both moo, except for grass ????????????

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...