What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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knock knock whos there banana banana who knock knock whos there orange orange who orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cause he was a chicken.

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What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Not Suzy" "Why?" "Because she has no arms"

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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Cliterus

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Your so gay, that you like men!

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Black people in Camden NJ.

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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