What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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A Jew, A priest and a Muslim go into a pub,put their differences aside and have a good time!

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Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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What's black on top, and white on the bottom? Rape.

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knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops