His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

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how many high school boys does it take to change a light bulb?? idk the light bulb in my bathroom is out and i need to know how many boys to call over to fix it.

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Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

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Jebron Lames.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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