- Anti Joke

I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

What's the difference between a cow and a Spanish person? To get to the other side

Q. A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for a book on suicide? A. The librarian hands the man a book on suicide

A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

what happened to the guy that got shot in the head? Nothing, it was a water gun.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

Two monkeys are sittin in a bathtub. The first monkey says to The second, "HEY! pass the soap." The second says to the The first monkey, "DUDE. thats not soap, its a typewriter!!!!"

Well... At that time everyone expected that the only people that knew hypnosis where either "born with the gift from the stars" or was some old beard man that spent "hundreds of years in the mountains".or a wizard or a shamanic priest, or well some guy in a particular stupid suit of sorts, it increased its potency simple as that, as having people stare at me and laugh because "You are not some beardy guru master" is a pretty bad start for the effective use of mass hypnosis. Mono-ideoism actually just means really concentrated focus on a single object or state of mind, the thing about the name (aside from sounding kinda mono-idiotic) is that strong focus alone does NOT lead to a state of relaxation which is one of the prime requirements to achieve a state of trance, I mean try focusing on something really hard and your body produces a huge amount of beta waves, aka stress. All of that is bullshit, but my horrible childhood did leave me with the "gift" to space out pretty quickly, so I learned it pretty fast without really knowing what it was at first.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope.

Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

My favorite part of the movie Frozen is when the parents die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops