Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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A black man and a white man are in a car. Which one is driving? A person who is legally allowed and physically capable of operating and automobile.

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

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A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

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What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops