Anders Lungren is a worthless peice of scrub

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your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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A man says to his doctor, "doctor, doctor, I think I have a split personality." The doctor responds, "That makes 4 of us."

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a skinny sumo wrestler

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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Dwight Howard

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Two muffins are in an oven. Ten minutes later we're enjoying delicious muffins together.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because, unfortunately, he is blind, prohibiting him from reading anything other than brail. He is, however, an excellent musician.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

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Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

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A small black boy was walking down the street. He ran into a police officer and the police officer shot him, why? A: Because the officer was racist.

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A black guy goes to the bar. The Barman say: What would you like to drink?

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What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops