1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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Q: What's a crutch's favorite song? A: Lean on me

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Neil is a reterd.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Whats worse than one jew. Ben rike

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What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

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what do round tank toilets do? blow up CC

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Why was 13 afraid of 27 Because 51 had an extra penis

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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Knock knock "Who's there?" "Bark bark" "Bark Bark who?" "Bark bark bark bark bark bark."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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