One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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A cat playing laser tag.

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

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Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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why did road cross the chicken Niggers love chicken.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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