A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops