Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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whats the difference between a Jew and a piece of pizza? pizza doesn't scream when its in the oven.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

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I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

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A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

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Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

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a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

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Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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Holy Tulip Answer- Sexy Mofo

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*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

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What was Helen Keller's favorite activity? fingering herself...

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how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks why the long face? the horse, incapable of understanding any human dialect, promptly shits on the floor and leaves

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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