What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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What's yellow and talks? A talking giraffe.

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What did the us reporter say? nothing as his head was in a isis members bin

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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What's big and long? My dick.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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Tucker Rivera

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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