What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

So,a guy walks up to his friends at the bar and try's to to talk to them,the friends start being rasist ,so the first guy says 'wo guys stop going in that direction ,that one direction

Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks why the long face? the horse, incapable of understanding any human dialect, promptly shits on the floor and leaves

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

What was Helen Keller's favorite activity? fingering herself...

Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

What did one apple say to the other???? Well, since they are fruits, and not people, they were unable to talk...

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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