How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

can you touch your toes? no

What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

I read the terms of service.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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