What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

Turkeys are obese

There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

Why was the man crying? He has aids.

A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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