Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

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Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

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I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

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What did the retard say to the other retard.. hey timmy how was work?

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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