Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

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why wont me daughter eat my feces

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I'm hungry.

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Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What's the worlds best ice cream? Well overall I opinion is that because but I believe down to the but don't forget to mention that chocolate ice cream plays a huge however to flip the argument moreover I find it absurd that on the plus side four sides to tell the truth I wouldn't know to summarize the argument whereas to differ I would my final point is that Chocolate Ice cream is nice.

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

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What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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Why are black people so good at basketball? They practice.

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PENIS

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god made the sea god helped invent the first wheel but as you know he also made me a really big deal !

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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