roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

What? Huh?

A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is an overused joke on a kid's cartoon. Thank me later.

pickles are green infection is yellow all the girls i know call me a good fellow

Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

A mum and a dad were having guests round for dinner. The daughter overheard them arguing. Dad was calling mum a b*tch and mum was calling dad a b*stard. The daughter asked them what it meant and they just said, "oh, it just means ladies and gentlemen". Later, when mum was doing her makeup, she dropped it and said oh "sh*t". Daughter asked what it meant and mum replked "it's just another word for makeup". After that, dad dropped the turkey and said "oh, F*ck!" Daughter asked what it meant and he replied "its another word for cooking". When the guests arrived, the daughter answered the door, and said "hello b*tches and b*stards. Mums upstairs stuffing sh*t on her face and dads in the kitchen f*cking the turkey".

Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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