What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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What do humans and fish both have in common? They both live underwater, apart from humans.

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did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

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Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

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Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

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what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

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What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

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why did the chicken cross the road? there was chicken food on the other side

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Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

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What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

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Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

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A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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